Welcome to the Wefugees Community and thank you for your question.
The platform and our experts are based in Germany. Therefore, I am afraid that we might not be able to give too detailed advice or share experience on Dutch (marriage/residence) regulations.
I made some research and found this website which states that you most probably need a residence permit (which means that you need to finish your asylum case) if you both live in the Netherlands, one of you is not Dutch and you want to marry. But please follow the link to get more details.
I hope this helps and all the best,