Hello @Derek
I understand 50/50 to mean shared custody with the mother (in German ‘gemeinsames Sorgerecht’). With this right, you have to be involved in the major decisions regarding your son (e.g. starting Kindergarten, school, medical procedures). You also have to right to have regular contact with your child, to visit him and have him visit you.
The rights around child access and custody are based on the country where the child resides, in this case Germany. You continue to have these rights in Italy.
As you are living at a distance, regular visits back and forth would not be easy or most likely in the best interests of the child. But he could possibly come and stay with you for longer periods during school holidays depending on his age.
Ideally, parents can come to an agreement between themselves about childcare, contact and visits. Often, however, this is not possible and one or both parents have to **** for another solution. A first step is to contact the Youth & Children’s Office (Jugendamt) in the area the child is living. They are obliged to assist you to have access and contact with your son.
Another way is to go to mediation, where a professional will try to help you to come to the kind of agreement I mentioned above. If no other solution is found, you can go to court to have your rights enforced. For example, a judge could then rule that the mother has to ensure weekly phone calls with your son and visits of a certain length.
From what I have read, the type of court responsible for such matters in Italy is called a ‘tribunale ordinario’. However, my answer here is based on initial reading about such situations and the individual case will depend on different factors.
There is a special organisation in Germany which advises parents whenever there is a conflict across borders. They have information in English and other languages. You can contact them and they will be able to give you far more detailed advice than I can here. Here’s their website:
https://zank.de/en/help-with/right-of-access/
Best,
Éanna