Hi @Lydia
You can keep a record yourself of the dates and times the father visits. The only additional evidence I can think of is if there are other people, e.g. friends, neighbours, family members, who see when the father visits and for how long. They could then also confirm as witnesses the detail of the visits.
You recently had a similar question which my colleague answered. I agree with her that contacting the Jugendamt or a family advisory service (Familienberatungsstelle) is a good first step.
Just to add that it is important to distinguish between Sorgerecht and Umgangsrecht. You and the father have shared Sorgerecht which you most commonly see when you both have to sign certain things at the child’s doctor or Kindergarten. The Sorgerecht, therefore, deals more with formal things than the day-to-day care.
The Umgangsrecht is the right and obligation to have regular contact with the child. This is commonly organised on an informal basis between the parents. If one parent does not fulfil their obligations, however, a written agreement on how, where and when the contact should take placed can be drawn up. Again, the organisations referenced can help you with this. If a parent then does not follow the agreement, the other parent can go to the family court and have a court order made that the other parent must follow. But this is a last step and the court encourages parents to try to first resolve any such issues themselves or with the help of a family support service.
If you are not sharing childcare responsibilities, then you are entitled to financial support in place of this from the father. These payments are called ‘Unterhalt’. If the father is unable or refuses to pay what he is required to, you can apply for the payment ‘Unterhaltsvorschuss’ from the Jugendamt.
Here is some more information on the difference between Sorgerecht and Umgangsrecht:
https://***-bmj-de.translate.goog/DE/themen/gesellschaft_familie/kinder/sorge_umgangsrecht/sorge_umgangsrecht.html?_x_tr_sl=de&_x_tr_tl=en&_x_tr_hl=en&_x_tr_pto=wapp
Best,
Éanna