Dear @anton888,
Welcome to the Wefugees Community and thank you for reaching out to us.
I highly recommend you to get in touch with a counselling office specialised on voluntary return ("Rückkehrberatung") - they can help you with bureaucratic issues which prevent your return. In Berlin, for instance, you may contact the IOM (you find their contact details here) or the counselling office at the LAF (follow this link to find their address, number and email). The counselling staff can also elaborate whether there any funding possibilitites for your travels.
I hope this helps and all the best,
Meike