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could be my last post in internet, read if u wish too. submitted by - in Asylum proceedings

Unfortunately i dont believe i deserve to live i had faced many horrible things, kidnaps situations , so much beating and threatening till now that i cant bear it. the last date i may live for is at 2017 summer or u can say mid 2017 i guess since this family almost know about im atheist and they dont pay my school anymore and kept beating me they had threat me so many times that will sell me to someone whether in jordan or saudi arabia i put that date incase they sold me in jordan.
im male and still would trade me as slave for money just bcz of being atheist im tired of everything if u have anyway to help do and dont watch me suciding before im rapped.
i have tried contacting the german embassy in call they ignore it always wasted like 15euros for international call without even answering on the consulate side.
made someone i know to go to the embassy and they kciked him bcz hes not 18
well i dont think ill escape this no one would help me getting any visa to pass jordan border
incase i sucided. let my voice reach everyone and share this post if u have some feelings on those non islam believers in middle east.
Take care and thank u for reading.

#Sucidial

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by Ma

Don't give up hope! I have written to someone from an organisation that helps victims of crimes (including slavery). They are in the USA, but maybe they know other organisations that are in Jordan. If they don't, I will try to find someone in Germany with contacts to embassies. --Ma

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Did I understand you correctly: You are in Jordan right now? Or are you in a country with a border with Jordan? If yes, which country? --Ma
Ma
gosh when i read urs u probably the only one gave me hope... i appericate how u try for me i currently live in saudi arabia but i hold jordan passport and im only able to travel when im in jordan so count me as im in jordan. ill be there soon.
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I am very glad to hear that you still have hope. It is good to know in which country you are, so I know where I can search for help for you. I have found an organisation in Jordan and I have written to them also. I hope you can travel from Saudi Arabia to Jordan without big problems. If not, I will try to find an organisation in Saudi Arabia.--Ma
Ma
i can easily travel from saudi arabia to jordan in months? to those who u contact are u sure they wont make it anyworse and can help me on what i ask for?
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Sorry, I did not understand your first sentence: "i can easily travel from saudi arabia to jordan in months?" Does that mean you cannot easily travel from Saudi Arabia to Jordan? I have contacted Safe Horizon, Terres des Hommes and Anti- Slavery International. I have NOT contacted any organization that thinks it will get known by a lot of people if they tell newspapers or TV about the people they help. Safe Horizon, Terres de Hommes and Anti-Slavery International ONLY tell newspapers/people who see their internet pages/TV about somebody they have helped if he is save now and if he WANTS to tell other people about what happened to him. They WILL NOT TELL ANYBODY else about you if you do not want to. Safe Horizon is in the USA and helps victims of crimes, including victims of human trafficking, that is if someone kidnaps you and brings to another country and then forces you to work. They help people in the USA, but I have asked them to send me addresses of organizations that are in Jordan. Their link is safehorizon.org/anti-traff... Terres des Hommes helps victims of child labour (if children or young people under 18 years are forced to work). They also help if your family beats you. I found a sub-organization of Terres des Hommes with an office in Germany that helps people in Jordan. The link of this sub-organization is in German (tdh.de/was-wir-tun/projekt... osten/jordanien/). Here is a link in English about the main organization Terres des Hommes where they say what they do to help children who are forced to work: tdh.ch/en/our-intervention... I hope you can see everything on this internet page, because they use very complicated technology on their internet page, maybe you cannot see it with an old computer. Anti-Slavery International helps slaves to be free again. They will very probably also help anybody to not become a slave, if he is not a slave, yet. antislavery.org/english/wh... All these organizations are large organizations. If they cannot help, I will try to find smaller organizations. Maybe it is easier for small organizations to help one person instead of a large group of persons. -Ma
Ma
first of all im so so so so thankful to u dear -ma, i cant describe to u how much hope u give me after every time u reply to me all the tough things i have during i read what u write me it just make comfy abit and nothing or no one tries to help me than u and this site im so so thankful to u dear ma. thank u so much for everything u do to me. i contacted antislavery support, but about the tdh. ill contact them and know if they can help me dear ma if horizon has replied to u pls tell me thank u so much
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What i basically need is visa to allow me to seek asylum outside for my situation but im not 18 to do it on my own thats why im into u dear i hope u bear me and my situation
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I am very glad to read that you have hope and that you don't give up! There is an organization in Frankfurt in Germany called Pro Asyl. They know everything about the laws you need to know when you want to apply for asylum in Germany and refugees can write them and ask them about the laws that are important in their situation. I have written them and told them about your situation and asked them how to apply for asylum if you are under 18. Like the other organizations I have told you about, they will not tell anybody about you or do anything without asking you first. This is their web page: proasyl.de/en/pro-asyl-adv... There are many people asking for their help, I don't know how much time they need for answering. The other organizations probably also have many people asking for help, so don't get nervous when they need a long time to answer. -Ma
Ma
i dont get worried as long the ones we contact are willing to help and i do understand well the take time and so on, before month and 20 days there was stream on video of offical unhcr page i commented about the jordan unhcr that they dont respond to my emails back from 2months and i kept trying and they dont respond i tried sending to unhcr of germany or else they tell me we are only responsible for those whos in germany and they all tell me to contact the jordan unhcr. so this guy came to my comment at that video he works in jordan unhcr, he was muslim though, i wasn't comfy telling him my situation im not racist or anything but any strict muslims would be against any atheist or other. so i fear that i explained him and asked him to ask the office if they will to support me or so i told him i dont mind waiting till june or mid summer if its sure but if they cant help me and u just ignore me tell me from the begining and dont let me worried and waiting for nothing dear mohammed. he ignore me till this day. Outside that Dear ma, im so thankful :) and surely i can wait an answer.
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unfortunately unhcr cant help me with visa i got this answer from offical unhcr. not jordan one but still an answer
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Pro Asyl has answered. Unfortunately they have not written anything new: They have written that your parents must ask for a visum for you if you want to come to Germany, and you have to come to Germany if you want to seek asylum. So they could not help you with that. But they have also given me the internet address of a Christian organisation called Caritas in Jordan. They clearly say that they help all people: atheists, christians, muslims... (I say this because you are worried that muslims might not help you if you are an atheist.) Their internet address is caritasjordan.org.jo. They are helping children and young people in difficult and hard situations. On their internet page they write much about helping Syrian refugees, because there are so many Syrian refugees in Jordan now, but they also write that they help Jordanians just as much. Do you want me to write to them? <br><br> One very important thing I want to tell you: All this takes a long time and I'm worried that you can feel hopeless and suicidal again. If you feel so bad again, please talk to professional people online. If you feel that your life is too bad to go on living, they will help you feel strong enough even for a life that is very bad for some time. Their internet address is suicidepreventionlifeline.... someone-now/ Click on "chat with lifeline" and you can write them and they will answer immediately. Of course they will not tell anybody anything of what you tell them. I hope I do not scare you, and I hope that you will never feel so bad again. But if you do feel so bad again, you must know that there are people who can help you. - Ma
Ma
Hi dear, you know im just so depressed and full of fears not just becz of what i have its becz the little time i have time only until September and after that i cant be in jordan anymore and then ill be either the slave or sent to the goverment of saudi. which really burns me and scares me... so what make me filled with sucide thoughts that is i rather die if i cant be helped in this situation and time has runed up then i'd really chose to die then facing goverment or being slave... :( yes contact them :( talking to anyone wouldn't help me with thoughts dear i just need en sureness becz im so scared. hope u get what i mean :/
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I understand that you are so scared. We will find somebody who will help you. I have written to Caritas, and I am making a list about who else can help if Caritas can not.**If you can in any way, when you think about the things that can happen to you, try to think about the people who can help you. We will find help.
Ma
hey dear i think of u every min u and the one who is trying look for me aswell, im having chickenpox and fever atm incase for any late reply i hope u forgive me about it. i hope ur having good days though.
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I am sorry you have chicken pox. I hope you will get better soon. As soon as I get any answer I will tell you.
Ma
Alright, thank u
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How are you? Are you still sick? I hope you are getting better. Don't worry if you cannot reply early. I was not at home last week and could not reply early, too. *** I am thinking about the problems you have with the visa. There is an organization that helps children in Jordan who are separated from their parents while they travel to seek asylum. I think maybe: If you tell this organization that your family wanted to go to Turkey to apply for asylum and that you lost them, they will help you. Then you would not need a visa. The organization writes on its Internet page that they have a phone number you can call and then they will give you a safe place where you can stay. Their internet adress is defenceforchildren.org/dci... *** I have a question: Do you have a passport? I have read that there are three countries where you can go without a visa: Egypt, Tunesia and Turkey. But you probably need a passport. If you have one, we could also look for organizations there.
Ma
Sorry, you already wrote you have a Jordan passport. So with your passport you can go to Egypt, Tunesia and Turkey, and we can also try to find organizations there.
Ma
Hi dear! my chickenpox was gone from 7 days now new areas getting itchy again but better than ever thank u for asking. how are u? are u fine too? i hope!. firstly i have jordan passport thats right and i can travel to turkey with no visa for 90-190 days but i cant lie about that organization that my family are outside because this is punishable since its not true. i thought same as u about applying to turkey but since my situation is not like the syrians im not sure if ill be accepted there. i have been looking for offices i couldn't find it at all. this is main case for now ill keep looking for turkey offices outside that. i have last hope for europe but still without visa someone told me about an german airlines and im trying to contact them about my situation and i wanna ensure if i can travel without visa to their airport. this is their site:lufthansa.com
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I am glad you are getting better! I have been thinking about your problem that many organizations help Syrians but not Jordanians, because in Jordan there is no war. I have found organizations that say: 1. they help refugees also if they are not from Syria and 2. they also help people if they are from countries where there is no war: UNHCR, Médecins Sans Frontières (=Doctors without Borders), the International Rescue Committee, the Norwegian Refugee Council, Save the Children and Association for Solidarity with Asylum Seekers and Migrants. (You have written that UNHCR in Jordan has not answered anymore, but at the UNHCR in Turkey there will be a different person. Maybe this person will answer. You or I could also write to Save the Children again and see if we find a different person.) ****** If you go to Turkey, this is an organization with an office in the cities Ankara and Gaziantep that helps refugees in Turkey: Association for Solidarity with Asylum Seekers and Migrants, en.sgdd.info/?page_id=6 and en.sgdd.info/?page_id=1066 Their address and telephone number and email address is on en.sgdd.info/?p=1143. If you really go to Turkey you have to be careful. There are criminals who promise to help you go to Europe and then force you to work without pay. If it is possible, you should only get help from organizations. Here are the internet pages of the organizations that help non-Syrians and people from countries without war: Norwegian Refugee Coucil: nrc.no/countries/europe/tu..., UNHCR: unhcr.org/turkey.html, Médecins Sans Frontières (=Doctors without Borders): msf.org (but in Turkey Doctors without Borders only has an internet page in Turkish sinirtanimayandoktorlar.org/), International Rescue Committee: rescue.org/country/turkey, Save the Children: savethechildren.net/our-re..., Association for Solidarity with Asylum Seekers and Migrants: en.sgdd.info
Ma
Hi dear ma,i hope u are fine. they turkey unhcr is also not answering me tried every mail in their site no replies, and i contacted en.sgdd.info/ in past 3 days no answer yet. and there is site i couldn't open from my laptop idk why can u mail them instead of me this one sinirtanimayandoktorlar.org/ i couldn't mail this org only this one. do u mind doing that? thank u alot dear for every help u provide me and everything u done to me i appericate everything. im really worried of not finding org in turkey ill have to travel in 3 months and i still cant ensure a org it make me feel so worring and more worse :( im contacting many orgs but no one replies to me
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Hey ? are u fine? i hope so
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I hope you are fine too. Wefugee community does still hear you, we have a lively interest in your situation, so keep in contact with us if you feel so.
Jan
idk dear jan my thoughts are leaving me but i have hope for turkey, every org i contact either they cant help me or ignore me. unhcr as well in turkey or in jordan both are ignoring me. im gonna flee to turkey in 3months but if i see worse treatment since they're islamic then i really want to give up im losing my hopes day by day if in emails they're ignoring me how will they care about my situation in real? it makes sense for me. my day is spent entirely emailing sometimes i can read sometimes not but turkey is my only hope. and hope they will not neglect me or anything. my mental health is under 0.
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by Paolo (Wefugees)

As managers of this community, we have to rely on the experts hands of those who are able to handle these situation regarding suicidal thought with professionality. For this reason we are putting this case in the hands of expert helpers.

For whoever felt him/herself in the condition of having similar thoughts, I leave these links to websites where you can find a list of hotlines available worldwide that you can reach out to at any moment.

knowyourdepression.tumblr....
suicide.org/international-...

This is another valid websites where you can find different types of support in case you were about to experience trouble with suicidal thoughts.

suicidestop.com/

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I wanna say i didn't write u this to give me the links appericate it but if u really read carefully u would know i had never gave up beffore i think exactly as how i should be and right thing but i dont think i would vist those sites when i know ill be slave?
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